From The Plain Dealer   - Saturday Nov 18, 2006

ETHICS

Be glad for dedication of kids' other parents

Bless the nutty sports parents.

As a recovering NSP, I can tell you our faults are many -- from an obsessive need to cram one more game into an already crowded weekend to the ability to analyze player drafts with a zeal that would make us highly successful if applied to other areas of our lives.

Before you criticize us, however, pause to give thanks. If you have been a volunteer coach, you have spent hours on the telephone reminding kids of games and practices, have run your own taxi service and have served as a groundskeeper, referee and amateur psychologist -- and that's just when the other parents act up.   

Sometimes, when you are gently encouraging and teaching other people's kids and placing unrealistic expectations on your own children, you have to wonder if it's worth it.

Recently, at a funeral Mass for one of Avon Lake's most dedicated volunteers, several hundred of us heard a resounding yes to the question of whether people who become involved in kids' sports make a difference.

Gino Strippoli, who died of a heart attack after officiating at a soccer match last month, was a nutty sports parent. Strippoli, deputy copy desk chief for features at The Plain Dealer, coached several soccer teams, organized soccer tournaments, ran skills clinics and was a referee.

He had served as president of the Avon Lake Soccer Organization and the Avon Lake High School Athletic Booster Club.

Fortunately, shortly before he died, he was able to experience some of the love that came from his labors. Members of the Avon Lake varsity soccer team honored Gino, one of their youth coaches, on senior night. After the ceremony, the seniors ran up to the press box to shake his hand and give him a hug.

At his funeral, hundreds of young people were among the mourners who packed St. Joseph Church. In a reflection at the end of the service, his buddy, a fellow NSP, encouraged people to honor Gino by volunteering to work with kids. The effort is worth it, even if we nutty sports parents have a lot of issues to address.

The most important is that we respect the dignity of every child and place their moral, physical and social development above winning at all costs. Particularly important to me as a coach was showing every child that she or he matters, which I did by providing substantial playing time for each child.

When I founded and for three years ran an outdoor summer basketball league for middle school kids, I made a rule that every child must play at least half the game. It is heartening to me that many youth sports programs in Northeast Ohio have rules mandating equal playing time. And that the Catholic Youth Organization of the Diocese of Cleveland is addressing the issue in its sport programs.

As we discuss these concerns, however, it must be with mutual respect. The work all volunteers do for youth sports must be valued. Gino showed us that the sacrifices volunteers make strengthen a community and help build the next generation.

It's not always easy. Soon, a new crop of coaches will turn their attention to baseball drafts.

Think how hard it is to make reasonable judgments as an assembly line of kids who haven't played ball all winter are thrown five or six tennis balls in a middle school gym by fathers who can't pitch straight.

So give nutty sports parents a break, or even a hug from time to time.

To reach this Plain Dealer columnist:

dbriggs@plaind.com, 216-999-4812